Talking to Demons
by Hawk Clowd
Summary: How do you stop yourself from becoming a monster? Yuki Eiri talks to himself. Sort of.


**Title:** Talking to Demons

**Author:** Hawk Clowd

**Disclaimer:** Gravitation belongs to Tokyopop and whoever else owns the rights to the show and/or manga.  I don't begrudge them that at all.  Honest.

**Blood Type:** nail polish remover.  Just because.

**Warnings:** very few.  Some spoilers, I suppose, would be pretty much the only real warnings I can think of.  Seriously.  I think I'm going soft.  _

**Archived:** just the usual places.  The Fish Pond.  FanFiction.Net.  Maybe on live journal or something, if I ever get around to posting it there.

**Author's Notes:** I wrote this story in class one day.  My professor was super-boring and I just didn't feel like working or taking notes, so I wrote this instead.  It takes place sometime after the end of the series, I suppose, but it could really fit in anytime after Shuichi's little incident with Aizawa from ASK.  This story consists mainly of Yuki Eiri talking to himself.  Sort of.

---

You've changed, Eiri. 

I have not.

Want to bet? 

No.

Why not?  I know why.  Because you know I'm right.  Is that it, Eiri? 

No.  
  


Liar.  You've turned into a liar, Eiri.  You know you have.  You never used to lie to anyone about anything.  Isn't that right, Eiri?

...

Yeah, that's right.  You know, you--

Shut up.  You're going to wake up Shuichi.

Oh, right.  The brat.  Could you believe what he did today when he came home?  Honestly, how old is that kid, twelve?  Pssh.  Rock-star boyfriends can be so annoying.

…

He makes you cry inside, doesn't he?  The brat, I mean.  He reminds me of how you used to be before Kitazawa showed up and that really hurts you, doesn't it?  Some days you just want to--

No.  He makes me smile.  Seeing him smile makes me smile too.

And he makes you cry.  You know that's true, Eiri.  It rips you up inside.  You know why?  Because you know that his happy little attitude isn't going to last very long in this awful world of ours.  The world is going to ruin him.  Just like it ruined you.

Shut up.

How much do you think they'd pay for him, though?  Kitazawa got ten dollars for you; he sold you cheap.  But this brat is used goods, you know, you spoiled that for him.  Of course, he's also famous.  That's a plus.  Ten dollars, twenty?  More or less, Eiri?

Shut up.

Answer the question.  More or less?

Shut up!

Fine, I won't talk about that anymore.  But it's really only a matter of time before they ruin your brat boyfriend just like they ruined you.

Aizawa...

That was different.  The brat didn't love Aizawa like you loved Kitazawa.  But do you know who the brat does love like that, Eiri?  Do you?

...Yes.

Good!  So how long will it take for you to turn into the same sort of monster at Kitazawa, Eiri?  How long will it be before you let the world take over and you ruined him like Kitazawa ruined you?  How long until he gets to be as worthless and cheap and--

SHUT UP!

Oh, you don't like that?  I'm sorry.  But it's going to happen you know.  It's really only a matter of time.

Not to Shuichi.  It can't happen to Shuichi.

Why not, Eiri?  What makes him so special?  If it could happen to you, it can happen to him, too.  Deal with it.

Not to Shuichi.  It...  He's different.  From me.

How?  What is he, Superman?  It will ruin him, Eiri, just like it ruined you.  Because he's exactly how you used to be.

No he isn't.

Then what's so different about him, Eiri?  What's going to save him?  You?

Maybe.  But I don't think he needs me to help save him.  He can save himself.

...How?  Tohma tried to save you, remember?  That didn't work.

I don't know how.  Maybe because he's stronger than I ever was.  The things Aizawa did to him would have hurt me deeply, even if I didn't like him at all, but they didn't do anything major to Shuichi.  He doesn't let the world get to him.  And I'll be there to make sure nothing happens.  I won't give up on him like Tohma did to me.  I won't just leave him to his own devices and let him stew over what happened to him over and over and over again until he can't even think straight and he starts to run away from himself.  I won't let him be like me.

And you think that will save him?

Yes.

You've gotten soft, Eiri.

No, I haven't.  I've always been soft, remember?  You're the hard one, Yuki.  I haven't changed.  You have.

...Shut up, Eiri.

Yes, it was nice talking to you, too.  Pleasant dreams, Yuki.

**-owari-**


End file.
